Chhoti Chhoti Baatein...

It was a wednesday... late in the night. We were coming back from office after a long day. Had been late. Again. All of us had either missed out on a late night 'garba' plan, or missed another chance of goin out with family, or was plain unhappy to be late. Typical end-of-the-day gloom...

Then suddenly, at a traffic jucntion, there was a man selling a small toy for kids... a thread-mounted Phirki and i bought it for no apparent reason whatsoever. I couldn'y play it properly, and soon the whole group in the car was busy trying to teach each other how to do it right, chuckling, giggling and laughing all the time. The next one hour drive was as pleasant and cheerful as could have been.

And I was later left wondering why we need triggers to make us happy and become sad and gloomy spontaneously...

I still keep that Phirki that changed the mood of the car pool the other day. Just hope that somebody or the other keeps inserting a Phirki into each others' lives every once in a while... just for an ocassional heartfelt smile, if for no other reason!!!

Flashes in the pan

I am not known to myself as someone who lets out random thoughts... or so I like to think. But who cares... a lot of things I have done in recent past that I didn't know that i would... and life has not exactly been bookmarked in recent past... keeps on getting more and more weird by the way...

Monsoon seems to have passed in Mumbai as well. Doesn't rain much. I miss the rain... not because of my love of weather and seasons, but because of the memories that Mumbai rain associated with it... the ecstatic feeling of love, moments of nostalgia and dreams of future... most of them gone now... just like the rains. Something tells me I should have associated them with sun rather than rain... at least wud have been perpetual, if not permanent...

Everybody has heard that life is a battle. I seem to be at war with life itself... it keeps on testing me with smashes and bruises, and I am keen to see whether the number of brickbats in its store is enough to stop me from keeping well and fine... till now, i guess I am winning... for I have my own stockpile of happiness, friendships, wishes and thoughts!! Makes memories sweet... dsn't it?

Yesterday a friend's friend's friend commited suicide. End sem results. Second year back. And suddenly everybody is critical of volatile nature of youth, and the affinity for impulsive decesions. Why should a life be defined not by the moments that made it up, but by those that ended it? Why should we not talk about the good man he was, and emphasize on totally irrelevent things?

Will add some more whenever get time next. Got work to do now...

Back to square One!!

Today, I am eating crow, and I am happy that I did not keep my word this time. So today, i will start from the last line from my first blog...

"And the day your dream lies shattered beside you, have the courage to keep your chin up and spirits high. For Dreams never Die. Niether do Dreamers."

So, in a way, I give up on one word, only to stick to another one... forget it... even I don't know why I am trying to justify a good thing that I have done, because of which the dream still lives on!!!

Today, I can think of no other way to restart my blogging days than with a tribute to the people who have always been mine... through thick and thin, through good and bad, through joy and sorrow. They are the people who have made my life worth living. I can think of no order, so I go with the alphabetical order.

Anubhab Roy... the dude of the branch, the ever flamboyant guy who will always bring out the silver lining from each adversity that anybody faced. Been lucky enough to have spent some great times with him... the one thing that I learnt from him once and for all is to look for solutions rather than excuses, and to dare.

Anupam Gupta... the unfathomable ocean of maverick ideas, which made up his daily life. With constant antics, he would keep everyone's mood fresh. Never the one to say 'no' (at least to me ;), i can say that). Such a dependable guy, will go to any lengths to help you out, and will never ever expect something in return...

Ashutosh Srivastava... the guy who knew me in and out, kept me going through all the roughs, who always told me never to think that I do not deserve what I want... always ready with something or the other to keep me alive and jumping. And most importantly, a shoulder to lean on. I wish we will convert some of our late night talks into reality... (not 'that' one... the other ones)

Kumar Anubhav... the oldest friend of mine... the guy who knows me for more than anybody else... always ready with friendly and matter-of-factly advice whenever I needed... and will make me feel cared about when I needed it the most... almost like my extended family... par pata nahi Mummy ko Madam kehna kab chhodega...

Parijat Naha... the more you say about this dude, the less it is... unlimited energy, as many talents as there can be in a guy, and very genuine as a person. Having had him by my side throughout the four years made the roller coaster ride through the other side of ITBHU feel like a cakewalk

Sunny Verma... another member of my extended family... gem of a person... took so many pains to be there for my family when I was not there... amazingly remembers all the crap that we studied in class XII... and teaches my sister!! I can't do that... for all that I am, I can smiply not do that!! And the one thing for which I will remember him is the red rose... thanks yaar...

Thank you friends... Thank you all!!!!

In the End.....

I tried so hard, and got so far...
...but in the end, it doesn't even matter!
I didn't even fall... but lost it all...
...but in the end, it doesn't even matter!!!

Well... so here i am again. This time the source of my amazement is the way all questions that I talked about just faded away in wake of the mother of all questions, both of which i managed to answer. So I got the bigger ones, but was (and am) totally lost in the smaller ones. So here go the answers.

Q1. How could you simply believe all that is said?
A1. How could I not believe what is said, given the person who was saying it?

Q2. If you really are in Love, how could you let her go?
A1. If I am really in Love, how could I (and why should I) stop her?

I know, I know. the answers are also questions. Vicious cycle, eh?

A dear friend of mine told me three reasons why people blog.
1. They are preparing for CAT
2. They are having nothing else to do
3. They are in Love

Well, everybody knows that I have never had any intention for getting through CAT. or GRE. or GMAT. And ever since I joined a multinational, the second option got struck off. And the dear friend of mine has obviously no idea of whether or not one can blog when he is in the condition that I am in.

So i guess this is gonna be my last blog. And anybody, for whom Priyank has ever sounded like a nice name, pray that I restart this blog (mind you, restart, not start a new one). and if the 'anybody' who happens to read this blog happens to be, like me, a non believer of sorts, just wish me good.

I know, I know. This is not the way Priyank ends things. so here it goes... my way.

Well... I hope that i will wake up to realise that the last seven days were a bad dream. (Well, they are unreal, for sure). And I hope that I will get a call saying that this was all a good joke!! (Did her voice tell me anything? Maybe it did.)

Hoping against hope? Maybe. But hope is such a wonderful thing. An option that I never strike off, unlike the three listed above.

Will be missing the inspiration behind my blogs.

Take care
Priyank Kulshreshtha

The belt doesn't match...

"Your belt doesn't match with your shoes today, Priyank!!! Mujhse pooch naa.... Brown belt mein mast lagega...."

The cheerful comment from my still sleepy flatmate... Not exactly what you wish to hear the first thing in the morning. Well, my moods don't match today. I don't know whether to be happy or sad. My attitudes dont match today. I dont know whether or not to laugh at things. For that matter, my life doesn't seem to match today. I dont know whether it is all blank out there or is it just haze that I am unable to see through.

And some part of the world still cares what color my belt and shoes are.

"Ya right. I should have thought of it". As if I have all the time in the world to consult Gucci and Versace to coordinate my accessories.

Why me?

Yet another one on questions… and I presume this is not gonna be the last…

A tennis champion (forgot the name… ) when diagnosed with an acute disease, was asked by a fan, “Why did it have to be you?” He replied, “When thousands watched as I lifted 3 grand slams in a year, I didn’t ask ‘Why me?’. So even now, when I inch closer to death, I do not have the right to ask, Why me.”

Today, I feel myself in a similar situation. Nothing threatens my life, though. But even then, it is as if something is slipping out of hand. Not that it was unexpected. Or maybe not even unfortunate or something I might not have deserved. But the way it did, I stand and feel the urge to ask, not exactly 'Why me?', but just 'WHY?????'

P.S. The comment is better than the post, so i decided that it needs a mention rather than a hyperlink. so, here goes...

The Tramp said......

Well the chap in question is the tennis legend Arthur Ashe...The incident goes as follows..During his battle with AIDS, from the world over, he received letters from his fans, one of which conveyed: "Why does God have to select you for such a bad disease"?

To this Arthur Ashe replied: The world over -- 50,000,000 children start playing tennis, 5,000,000 learn to play tennis, 500,000 learn professional tennis, 50,000 come to the circuit, 5000 reach the grand slam, 50 reach Wimbledon, 4 to semi final, 2 to the finals, When I was holding a cup I never asked GOD "Why me?". And today in pain I should not be asking GOD "Why me?"